What Now?

This was the question that kept going on in my mind. Things have quieted down and everyone else has gone on with their daily lives, what now? My life, our household, is definitely not the same. A huge part of me died with Justin.

I couldn’t eat, sleep or concentrate. Every thought was Justin and the pain of losing him. I love, I mean LOVE to read but I couldn’t take in a word. I’d stare at the television and didn’t take in a thing I was seeing. I couldn’t go back to work for four months due to all of this plus all the legalities that has gone along with his passing.

With a lot of therapy and trial and error, I learned that I had to take it moment by moment. I couldn’t look into the future because it was too bleak. My good days were the numb days. As time passed I had to teach myself to focus. I started crafting and working with plants. I needed life and creation. Doing something totally different than before. Like doing this blog.

I had to come to terms that the old Sandy was no more. The term “new normal” kept being said to me. I didn’t want a “new normal!” My old life was almost perfect! It has been very hard to come to terms with this new mindset but I’m making it.

Earlier I mentioned the future looking bleak. With time and learning who the new me is, the future has hope. Each day is a blessing and we have to treat it as such because you loved one wants you to find happiness. I believe with all my heart that they are still aware of all the good that goes on in our lives.

Though it may be hard to do during the rough days, look for what blessings are in your life. This will help you become more positive and that helps with depression and anxiety. By finding a positive, healthy activity that brings you joy, you will see less bleakness and more light.

Creating things have helped me. Let others know what has worked for you to find some joy. I look forward to seeing what is helping you to create the new you